Most Demanding 1st Birthday Invite Ever

Most Demanding 1st Birthday Invite Ever
18 Apr 2015

You have to read this first birthday party invite! It was posted on Reddit by user Razz32 for her coworker that received the letter. I will hold my comments until you have read for yourself:

My Reaction

At first as I started reading the letter, it didn’t sound too bad. I thought the mom was actually thoughtful in making sure gift givers knew exactly what to give the child – gifts that were a) needed, b) not harmful, c) desired (by the parents at least), and d) could be returned. I actually appreciated all the thought that went into the letter. Then as I read further, I interpreted the level of detail differently in my mind. It went from being perceived as helpful to quite offensive. The tone seemed more demanding than one of a soft recommendation.

If you are unable to get these items, please let us know so we can buy them right away for him.

Most Demanding Mom - 1st Birthday Invite

I took this as a threat – you better get this gift or else! The kicker for me was the next section titled “A few other important items”. The amount of cautions, dos and don’ts was just overwhelming. There was even a bold statement about the main cause of kidnappings (true or not, I have no idea). Each request was followed by a story of why it had to be done this certain way.

Right now, XX has 32 board books on his shelf, and 25 additional books waiting for him in storage once he is 3+ years of age...

Most Demanding Mom - 1st Birthday Invite

With all these requirements, threats, and cautionary statements, this Most Demanding Mom took all the fun out of gift giving. It now felt more like a job or obligation. That was it I had zero desire to get this kid a gift or even attend any party. The only way I would attend is if I could bring a crazy gift not on the list that violated as many of the rules as possible and then videotaped the MDM (Most Demanding Mom)’s reaction….Of course I would follow it up with a “Oh Just Kidding” and fork over a gift meeting all the requirements.

Yikes I can only wonder how detailed the actual ‘formal invite’ will be that “will be arriving in your mailboxes soon”.

Reaction of Others on Social Media.

Like any crazy, over the top demanding letter, this request went viral, not only on Reddit, but on Twitter and elsewhere. Check out how others reacted:

Better Ways

I can’t in good conscience dish out all this criticism of the Most Demanding 1st Birthday Invite without offering some suggestions for better ways of getting your request across.

The easiest way to communicate your demands without sounding demanding:

Sign up for a Gift Registry and share the link (ie. Target) at the bottom of the Invite.

Demanding, Not Demanding Mom - Better way to accomplish your goal

This one suggestion accomplishes several things.
1. Details Included – With a registry, there is a link to the exact item desired – all details already included. The item is marked by some SKU number, making it easy to find in the store or online. The likelihood of getting the wrong product is close to zero. This wipes out the need for the long details.
2. Removes the Story – Nobody needs to know the long boring reason behind why you want something done a certain way. You don’t need to justify why a kid has a certain item on the list. With a registry, the list is just that – a simple and concise list.
3. Less Demanding Tone – Since the registry is just a small link at the bottom of the invite, it doesn’t feel so forced and harsh as a separate letter delivered before the invite is even received.
4. No Receipt Necessary for Returns – If the gift giver buys the item off the Registry and asks the cashier to mark the item as such, it is not always necessary to have the actual gift receipt to return the item. If the tag is still on the clothing or toy, then in some stores they can look up the item on the Registry.
5. No Duplicate Gifts – if the item is marked off the Registry, then the Registry is updated to show as Completed instead of Needed.

Some may debate whether it is necessary for such a young child to have a birthday party registry. I would argue that if the mom is that concerned with getting the gifts ‘right’, then a registry is a much better option than being known as the ‘Most Demanding Mom’.

What are your thoughts on this demanding birthday invite? Any other suggestions for better ways?





As a working mom of twins, I look out for activities that are easy, quick and budget friendly with a creative flare. Likes to eat the frosting first!